May 18, 2001    
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Have you ever contemplated suicide?

Yes. I've seriously considered it about 3 or 4 times. Thankfully I've never been able to actually go through with it, but I've held the blade to my wrist, fully intending to kill myself.

Shanna, 16
Cardiff ENGLAND

no way, i love life!!!

Katie, 25
Seminole
, FL   USA

Many times but im way to chicken to do it. Too low tolerance for pain. And way too scared to actually want to die :P However it has seemed like the only solution to escape the pain at times. However, i'm still here, and have never actually attempted it, so..

Talia, 23
Wilton
, CT   USA

Uh huh. There was one time when I was really serious about it, but couldn't bring myself to actually follow through.

Jeremy, 14
Highlands Ranch
, CO  USA

Yes, and I was committed to a teenage institution when I was 17. I was only there for a week though. It helped a lot. The doctors & therapists there got me on the right medication, and I'm doing a lot better now. I think everyone has contemplated suicide at least once by the time they are 20 years old. Some of us don't actually attempt it.

Melodi, 19
Gahanna
, OH   USA

No way! I would never think so low of myself to do such a thing.  Plus it is  a selfish way out because people who do that aren't thinking of the feelings and reactions of their loved ones but only themselves.

Stephanie, 25
TX   USA

not just contemplated, but attempted.

Angela, 16
Bella Vista
, AR  USA

Of course!

Karen, 21
Marshelltown/Ames
, IA  USA

No. I don't think things could ever be that bad.

Eric2, 29
Kitchener
, ON   CANADA

Other than fleeting fascination with death, in general when I was in my early teens I don't contemplate suicide. I am lucky to always see a brighter day when I am feeling depressed.

Felicia, 35
Lowell
, MA   USA

Yes! In high school - not very seriously. In college - more seriously but not enough to try it. And once in my adult life when things really fell apart - but I did not have anything handy to commit suicide with and came to my senses by the time I did. Since then I have put my life back together and will hopefully never contemplate again.

Deb

Several times as a dramatically despairing 13 and 14 year old. I  never voiced my musings aloud because I was certain they would sound melodramatic and foolish.

Jill, 60
Saylorsburg
, PA  USA

Not seriously or for long.

Laura, 36
Lowell
, MA   USA

Contemplated suicice? Not really... well, one day when I was really desperate and felt very lonely, no friends, no girlfriend etc., I thought about it a bit... and then I was worried because I had this thought and immediately stopped thinking that.

Holge, 21
Linden  GERMANY

Sadly, yes. I am gay, and back in the day that was reason enough.

Eric, 19
Beverly Hills
, CA  USA

Yes... around a year ago for a good 3 months i did. I don't want to get into the specifics, I have never told anyone I wanted to kill myself, not even my best friend.

Johanna, 18
OK
  USA

Yes. I was "rescued." When you are seriously suicidal, you don't see it as a rescue, but more as a grand intrusion. That was a long, long time ago.

Fisch, 45
Preston
, CT   USA

Not recently.

Alias Irrelevante

The experts say that the thought of suicide passes through everyone's mind at some point in their lives, but no, I've not actually contemplated it as though I would indeed follow through. I'm not sure I could ever do it!

Tracy, 24
Ocean City
, NJ  USA

not seriously.

Maggie, 20
Sandwich
, IL   USA

Never. No matter how bad things may be, I am enough of an optimist to believe they will get better in the future.

Jane, 60
West Linn
, OR   USA

Yes. Normally I'm very good about it - no matter how depressed I am, I'm able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But when my girlfriend told me we had to break up (for reasons I prefer not to go into), my reaction was to grab an old pair of dirty dull scissors and saw at my wrist. I didn't do much damage - didn't really get to the blood - but I had a scar there for a number of months after. Of course, my girlfriend promptly took me to the ER for mentally ill people, and from there my parents picked me up. (Fortunately, my girlfriend and I are back together now.) A few years prior, I had been severely depressed and wanted to go to the local residential hospital, but my insurance wouldn't pay for it unless I was suicidal - so I said "gee, I dunno, if you don't admit me I don't know what I might do" and they let me in. I wasn't actually suicidal, just depressed - but they put me on suicide watch anyway. Unfortunately the insurance company quickly figured out that I wasn't suicidal, so I didn't stay there very long.  Even now, though, when I'm severely depressed I still see the light at the end of the tunnel. Mostly I scream and cry and howl and moan and whine a lot, but I don't try killing myself.

etoile, 20
Washington
, DC  USA

yes....

Sarah S., 17
Ithaca
, NY   USA

Only in a very vague way, never seriously.

Jonathan, 19
Brevard
, NC   USA

Yes I have. I think that everyone has at some time thought to themselves how life would be better if they were dead. But it takes a brave person to committ suicide. (Even though they say it's a cowards way out)

Anjel, 20

Sure.  Not recently. And hopefully never again.

Firelady, 23
Dallas
, TX   USA

I knew that question would come from you and it will be interesting to see your answer.   yes I have thought about it, I thought about it quite a lot in my early teenage years. I despised and still do the idea that girls have to dress up like meat and be devoured in order to feel that they fit into society. So instead of going out in hope that someone would find me attractive enough to shag I stayed in and taught myself to play the guitar and how to sing, it was a great outlet. However it did not get rid of that misplaced feeling, with hindsight I realise that a lot of people didn't agree with what I was doing was because they didn't consider it cool. I used to get frustrated and depressed and in a silly way I think that music was the only thing that kept me going, it was like that for two years. Then at college I got in a band and all of a sudden it's cool to be like me, the hypocricy cuts me to the bone.

Maria

I've thought about it (usually when I'm going through tough times)...but then my thoughts drift to my mom and I don't wanna make her sad:(

Kevin, 33
Sugar Hill
, GA  USA

Let me put it this way....if it were not for the Legendary Big Guy Sarge, I would not be around today to dispense my various witty (sic) remarks. Indirectly, I credit the Legendary Big Guy with saving my life...that would explain why I practically have a shrine too him...

Frodo
age unknown, parts unknown

Unfortunately, yes. I had a lousy life during my college years and early twenties and attempted suicide many times. Since then I've joined my present church and married a wonderful man and my life has changed to the extent that I can no longer recognize that sad, depressed, WILD girl as me.

Reba, 51
Rockville
, MD   USA

Yesterday / Tomorrow