January 27, 2001    





If you had to choose between a lifelong friend and love, which would you choose?

Well if this love was temporary and I could have the friend forever, I would have chose love. Like the saying goes "I would rather have loved and lost then never to have loved at all"

Stephanie, 25

Right or wrong, I choose love. If the other is truly a friend, they'll support me and still be there even if I am shown wrong.

Firelady, 23
, TX   USA

A lifelong friend. My friends will always come first, unless I was married.  But just to choose between love and a friend...a friend. Everlasting love and a friend...love.

Angela, 16
, SC   USA

Tough question! How do you choose between a life-long friend and someone who will be the rest-of-your-life companion? I guess it would depend on the situation so I can't answer it now.

Tracy, 24
Ocean City

I would hope that they would be one and the same.

Felicia, 35
, MA   USA

I think your love should BE a lifelong friend. If he or she isn't, what are you doing?

Karen, 21

*sigh* what if your best friend was your lifelong love? and he is...and perhaps it causes equal amounts of joy and pain. i cannot explain it all in this email, for how can words express the heartache of it all. If i had to choose, i would choose him, for he is one and the same.

Adrianne, 15

It would depend on the intensity of the relationships. The question is rather vague.

Jane, 60
West Linn
, OR    USA

Friends, they last longer.

Paul, 30
, MA   USA

That's it. That's it exactly. My best-friend is going through this very thing right now. If indeed you mean, something akin to: marry your bestfriend (whom you love) or strike out to find someone whom you pasionately love, like, it's always first kisses and marthon love making sessions. If you're talking about...something like, who would you take a bullet for, someone you love or your best friend...that's a hard one. If your saying, would you rather have a best friend and no love or a lover and no best friend...I guess I'd say best friend. Whew. I thought that question was simple, but...depends on how my mean it.

Jaden, 21
Brampton, Ontario  CANADA

Hopefully it wouldn't come to that. If the person was a lifelong friend I would hope that they would be thrilled if I fell in love. A friend or a lover shouldn't force you to make that kind of choice. But if it came to that, I think love would win... hopefully the friend would forgive eventually and come back.

Maggie, 20
, IL   USA

Hopefully, my love would be my life-long friend. Good question though. Who's asking me to choose? If the lifelong friend is asking me to choose, then I'd have to think long and hard about how much of a true friend this really is. If my love is asking me to choose, I'd have to know the bottom-line reason why this issue would be so important to him. If the reason is something valid and eye-opening, I'd probably stay by his side. If I felt it stems from envy or something irrational - I'd try like hell to quell the fear and not have to choose at all.

Fisch, 45
, CT   USA

Oh, that is an easy question: Friends layeth the smacketh down upon "love". After all, you can always rent love. Friends you can count on when, as John Mellencamp would say, "the walls come crumblind down."

Mick, 30
, IL   USA

I shouldn't have to choose. If my 'lifelong friend' is making me choose then s/he can't be much of a friend. If my 'love' was making me choose then he obviously doesn't love me that much. But if was was a different situation, then I would choose my lifelong friend because I would know that friendship will last, and you never know if love will.

Dianne, 16
Oshawa, Ontario

Life long friend. Love may die, but true friendhips will never end. I've already found mine and I never want to let her go.

Sarah S., 17
, NY   USA

Why would relationships with these two people conflict?

Jill, 60

lifelong friend

Melodi, 19
, OH    USA

I'm a little confused by this question. Is the love lifelong or temporary? I would always choose a lifelong friendship over a temporary love, but then again, in my book true love would always last. I would also choose a lifelong love over a lifelong friendship, but then again, I would consider a lifelong love a lifelong friendship, aswell.

Eric, 18
Beverly Hills

The friend. Anyone that would ask me to make that choice doesn't really love me anyway.

Kim, 30
New York
, NY   USA

Well, obviously I chose a love. But, we're friends too. So, I got the best of both worlds. Thanks to the beautiful, careful, STRATEGERY, of none other than God himself.

Lisa J., 22

It depends... would the love last, or would it fade?

Jeremy, 13
Highlands Ranch

Arrgh, I'm sick of love...yet I love love. It is a complicated area. I'm sick of dealing with everything that comes along with love though: Love, lust, like, true love, love at first sight, friendship, liking someone who wants to be a friend...Arrgh...my head hurts

Knox, 17

That's easy. Love. Because love and life long friend go together.

Laura, 36
, MA   USA

Tough question. I guess it would depend on the circumstance.

Janet, 42
E. Brunswick

Lifelong friend, no question.

Reba, 51
, MD   USA

a lifelong friend, because friends are more important than having a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a husband or a wife.

Karen2, 15
, MA   USA

I honestly don't think I could make that choice. . This sorta seems like an unfair question, I mean, I honestly believe that I love pretty freely, I do love most people I know. . . .And the person who I eventually marry will almost certainly be someone who I'll always want to be a "lifelong friend". . . That's a bit of a cop-out probably, but I think the question assumes a certain model about "friendship" and "love" that I can't personally believe in. . .

mothmc, 36
Los Angeles

Life-long friend. At least they'll be there for life!

Kevin2, 18
Frazier Park

Yesterday / Tomorrow